Why do I still see this curtain made out of smoke. It lingers there, as if the happiness I feel right now was not enough for the world. I see you like a blurry shadow at the end of the hall. You turn around and you leave. I breathe trying to scream and stop you but my lungs are full of smoke. You can't see me, the smoke it too thick. You can't hear me, the silence is deafening. And yet, I still smile to the curtain. I smile without you. The perfect façade. The never ending lie. I lie to you, to myself, to the world. I feel less sane everyday but somehow more alive. Less real but at the same time more myself. The contradictions are endless. But you are not here to hear them. You are just not here.

I give up.

True

I miss it all. The warm smiles, the silly laughs, the endless nights, and above all, I miss you. All of you. Your kind words, telling me to go on, are burn in my skin. The truth of the True never fading away, always clear. Thank you for giving me Wonderland, for giving me a place to come back to.

Nothing at all

The puppeteer is moving the strings, are you bending to his will? Do you seek a way out? Looking into the void, lost of all devotion for life. How long until you lose your mind? how long until you see nothing but the bright lights of an empty stage?

I see you in your beautyful crystal cage, with death in your smile. Where are you now, I wonder?

You might think this small paragraph is a bit strange but I don't care. This words don't mean anything to anyone. Why would you care what I scream into the air?. Like the mist this words will fade away into oblivion. No reason to remember them. No reason to write them down in a pice of paper and put in the black hole of your wallet. No need for all of that. This words are here just for you to read, process and erase. Nothing more. If you liked them, great. If not it's ok too. Doesn't matter. Just wanted to say something to noone.

Where is my pack now? Where did the song go? You promised. Where are you now that everything is falling apart?

White

In the moments of greater desperation comes our greater strenght. Fear becomes an ally. When time slows down and our sences die, we find hope in the darkest place and we find the way back up to the world. We are the ones that survived, we are the ones that fight. We are the ones that see the horror to feed on it, and make the choices that have to be made. We stop just to take a breath and we carry on. We choose not drown in disppair, we choose to be heroes. Like a phoenix we rise from the ashes.We seek the truth hidden in the lies of the world. We trust in nothing but ourselves. I wonder about the future and I imagine nothing but a white screen.

Gone

You disappeared. In a big cloud of grey smoke, you disappeared. I saw you leave. Now I wonder if you are lost?. If you are fine. Did you find the place you so desperately seek? How come you didn't came back and why is it that I still wait and hope to see your face. So many have said their good-byes. So many have left this Godforsaken place. So many wave their hands with a sad smile on their faces. So many now...... but I am still here. I remember what T once said..... he said "everyone I love, leave me...." Could it be so? Are we all leaving? I feel so helpless, useless, blind. Everyday I wait for a call, a message, a note, a voice that proves me wrong. The smoke is long gone and you with it.